Wanted dead or alive
by MarauderCracker
Summary: Badboy!Kurt  McKingley High official badass, AKA Kurt Hummel, wouldn't expect to fall for some preppy private school boy but, as always, life is full of surprises.
1. Rehearsal

**Rehearsal**

The day of the boy against girls challenge, Kurt does not feel specially pitched to teaming with the guys. Unless, of course, they _team up _to beat the crap outta that bunch of homophobic assholes. _We're talking about _singing_, Kurt, focus._

"Well, guys, I already know who we are facing!" Schuester is pretty excited about the news, it seems. Kurt isn't really paying attention, chewing his anger in a corner of the rehearsal room.

They usually don't say a word about Kurt's sexuality, because they know that, though the guy is skinny, he is a very good kicker. And that is the problem, at the end._ Being_ _kicker at the football team, and the showers._

The problem always starts in the showers, with all that football-player over developed ego that tells them that any human being near to them must want them crazily. All that huge egos, naked. And the gay guy. Not a good combination.

(Schuester is talking something about a bunch of oldies that sing 50's songs and are called "The Hipsters". Kurt listens long enough to decide that such thing does not deserve his interest, and puts his earphones on.)

Yesterday, it exploded. No one could say that Kurt Hummel avoids a fight, and fight came looking for him. In the form of Azimio and Karofsky, two giant assholes that didn't want the faggot to be naked in the same room as theirs.

Kurt's got an ugly bruise in the neck, fingerprints that stain purple in the line of his jaw. It took him a bit to get rid of Azimio's grab and set a fist against his nose. A knee sank in Karoksfy's stomach, and grabbing his stuff as fast as he can, he ran out. Kurt has too much w_arnings_ to get in another fight.

(Now Schuester is talking about an all boys school, but Kurt just couldn't know. He listens to bands in the line of Paramore and My Chemical Romance when he's pissed at the world, and a guy screaming against his timpani is isolation enough from reality.)

The reader could ask why, then, is Kurt mad at the Glee boys. _Nothing, nothing at all_, he says. Kurt is a sarcastic little bitch when he wants, he can admit it. He just sends a murdering stare to the guys and clenches his fists, and they all know that he is not only mad. They know they better never get in a fight because Kurt will not only leave them alone, but maybe team up with the enemy and beat them till all of their bones are broke.

(Schuester starts talking about the challenge right when the song takes a break, and Kurt hears enough to know he should listen to what he's about to say, so he takes his earphones off.)

He's about to go with the girls.

(They've got a much better music taste, besides. Puckerman won't listen anything but punk and Mike loves some Japonese Metal bands that Kurt finds really annoying.)

He gets called girl and fairy every single day. And he answers with fists. He goes around with "out and proud" written in his forehead, and can bang that same forehead against yours and knock you out if you say something.

And he is not afraid of going with the girls. Just because of setting a statement. He was in the cheer leading team, and from that got to the football team. Kurt Hummel does whatever he wants. He can get Quinn in the air in a performance while singing "Wannabe" at the top of his lungs, or get in the football pitch while Pink's "Funhouse" blasts out the speakers and do the best kick of his life. Every match, he does the best kick of his life. And better next time.

Kurt Hummel wears skin tight light jeans that make even the straightest guys of the school check his ass twice. Black boots matching a leather jacket that seems to have been borrowed from _Beat It_'s video clip, and always various silver chains around his neck, like it's an accessory. Girly necklaces, Azimio said and got punched but a fist tangled in them.

Why couldn't he go with the girls if he wants to? Mr Schuester calls his attention and, instead of arguing, Kurt runs a hand trough his perfectly disheveled hair and goes to sit with the guys. Puck and Finn, the ones who were directly next to him yesterday at the guys' lockers, look like they want to bury their heads in a hole somewhere.

(Kurt wonders why he couldn't just let his earphones on.)

The challenge is pretty ironic, Kurt finds. Schuester wants them to make a song that is "classically sung but the opposite gender". Kurt uses to have fun breaking the music stereotype, singing Britney Spears or Lady Gaga in a way that makes them sound like every song was written for him to sing it. Kurt likes the androgynous looks he carries sometimes. But giving this "challenge", whit the current situation… It must be a joke.

They end up discussing. Of course. Puck suggests to make Avril Lavigne's _Girlfriend_. He is just horny with the _punk princess_, for God's sake. Kurt is okay as long as they don't change the lyric to "boyfriend". Puck says something utterly stupid and Kurt's right hand is dangerously fisted around one of the long chains around his neck. When he does so, any one that knows him runs.

Sam gets in the middle, trying to calm all of them down. But Puck and Kurt are almost the same, in a lot of ways: they both are sarcastic, smartass, unable to stay quiet, "Bad Boys". Kurt snaps a bitchy answer and Puck suggests, not so kindly, for him to go do something useful like spy on the other Glee Clubs or jump under a train.

Kurt, deciding that, in despite of how much a jerk Noah Puckerman is, he values his friendship and said relationship can't afford another broken nose. So he gives up the fight and storms off the room.


	2. Research

**Research**

Kurt's house is next to the workshop, so he leaves the motorbike a few streets away. He does not want his dad or Carole to know he skipped rehearsal. Luckily, he knows both of them are out. He's got to be sly if he doesn't want Burt to notice movement on the house from the garage, but that's not so hard. He enters trough the back door, trying to make no noise.

He picks his laptop from the kitchen in the way to this room. He's got a bathroom in the basement (well, he and Finn do, sometimes he forgets he's got a step brother now, and it will be official when Carole and Burt finally marry), so he sneaks there. He prefers not to smoke in his room, because Finn hates the smell and Burt hates the bad habit of his son.

He sits in the sink, with the computer on his lap, and gets the cigarettes from the inner pocket of his jacket. He lights one while getting into Google.

A deep drag, while typing "Dalton Academy". He humbles some random song, raises an eyebrow when getting into the official page of the school. "Oh, god, what a hideous uniform." he hisses, smirking. The spy thing may be a lot harder if he's got to dress like that. Definitely, he hasn't such awful pants on his closet.

He finds where is the School Campus places, and sighs. It's a one hour drive. It would have been much easier to punch Puckerman. It is not like his friendship is so worthy. _Fucker._

He flicks the cigarette trough the deadlight. He has to stand over the toilet to do so, because said window is at the higher of the wall, and while doing so, he can see a little of the street. He sees his dad's wagon pull out of the garage and, while getting back into his room, he hopes he does not see his motorbike in the way.

Now, he has to find something that looks, at least slightly, as that awful uniform.


	3. On Road

**On Road**

Kurt knows he shouldn't drive with his earphones on. He shouldn't, definitely. He is the son of a mechanic, he knows enough of how accidents occur. But, damn. He needs music to calm him down. He just… _Needs to shut his mind down._

So he puts the earphones on, but in a volume that can't fully isolate him from the world. He could hear a horn or a siren if needed so, that's the important thing.

He puts the helmet on, and sits on the motorbike. Before turning the engine on, he scrolls down the folders on his Ipod, until he finds the perfect playlist for his current mood.

The ride to Dalton seems shorter with Death Cab for Cutie pounding inside his head. It starts getting into him, calming him down, as soon as it starts sounding, but it's a determinate song the one that changes his mood.

_Some boys_ is playing and Kurt sings softly to himself. He's already out of Lima, driving down the road to Dalton, and starts singing louder.

_Some boys are filling, some boys are filling the hole. They're making the killing at the top of the billings their role, and that's all that they know._

His anger fades away. It is, at the end of the day, music, the only thing that is with him no matter what. Even more than Mercedes, his closest friend. Even more than Finn and Puck and Sam, though they have gotten very close and they are buddies and they back up each other (well, sometimes). Even more than his dad. It's music what stays with him.

_Some boys are sleeping, some boys are sleeping alone. Cause there's no one that's keeping them warm through evening. They know that they're on their own._

If Kurt was one to cry, he would be crying. He is not. The only times he cries, it's from anger. From frustration. He fists the walls till his knuckles are bleeding, and cries while doing so. But he does not cry from sadness, and that is what he feels.

_Some boys don't know how to love._

The song ends. Kurt decides he's no longer mad at Puckerman. Because he was mad at Puckerman, at the end. Not at Finn, though he's his step brother and, if someone had to back him up, it was him. Not at Mike, though they've known for ages and been something like friends since long before Kurt became a football player. And definitely not with Sam, Sam is just the new kid, and doesn't need to get into trouble. But he was mad at Puckerman. Because he always felt attracted to Puck, but since Finn and him are brothers, they hang out together a lot more and maybe Puck is not just hot, he's also smart and sarcastic and talented and fun and has an acceptable music taste (when he stops listening to shitty punk and so).

Well, it's stupid to be mad at him. They aren't even friends. A few months ago, Puck offered kindly to wait until Kurt got his expensive leather jacket off before beating him down to the ground and then throwing him into the dump. A cute gesture because they were both in Glee, but he almost broke his nose that time, still. _You shouln't mess with Kurt's _perfect _facial features._

Puck's got no duty to back Kurt up if Azimio and Karofsky are being jerks, and Kurt's got no right to be mad at him. It's ok.

_They won't get what they want._

Dalton Academy appears at his sight.


	4. Dalton

**Dalton**

The security guard at the gates of the campus buys easily that Kurt is here to visit his brother. Just for once, he is not dressed like a punk kid, and he's got a really angelical face when he wants. The motorbike, though, is not the best for his good boy image, but he gets in. There's a lot of Smiths in the world, any of them could be studying at Dalton and have a brother called Kurt. It makes sense.

It's not that hard to find his way to the principal building of the school, park and get into. The problem is guessing where the show choir could be. Because he's got definitely no clue.

All he sees are ugly uniforms, boys walking in all directions with responsible expressions on their faces and a general ambient of good behavior. The school stinks of high class.

Kurt gets to the second floor without being noticed. His clothes don't look exactly like the uniform and he is pretty sure that none of the Dalton students has a backpack as his. Or even a backpack, because it seems like everyone's got the books on arms and nothing else. But, even with such differences, no one looks at him. And he is not used to being unnoticed.

He is about to give up. It seems like everyone here looks the same, and every hallway and classroom is identical. How could he find the auditorium? Even the doors are all the same.

Suddenly, something in the ambient changes. Everyone talks louder. It seems like everybody's rushing to somewhere that is definitely not a class.

"Excuse me..." The tall guy ignores him. "Could you..." A short kid walks past him without noticing his attempt to get his attention. "Excuse me..." Nothing. For first time in years, Kurt is totally invisible. Isn't it a good change?

He follows the mass to the staircase, and down to the first floor. He had just decided that, as soon as everybody calms down, he will get the fuck out of this stupid school, when... When someone sees him.

He is at the middle landing of the staircase, when stops to think if isn't it a bit smarter to just stand there and wait until everybody has left. In that moment, he looks up from his feet, to the people at the end of the staircase. And someone fixes his sight.

There's a short boy that has just turned around, and his eyes naturally lock at Kurt's. And he smiles. Why does he smiles? Kurt is not really used to strangers smiling at him for no reason, and he feels incredibly awkward.

"You seem lost." The guy says, while approaching him trough the crowd, and Kurt mentally punches himself. He's so obvious even a kid could see he's a spy.

"I am, actually. I'm new." He lies, trying to fix his façade. "Where's everybody going?" He asks, the second next, so the boy can't question his excuse.

"Oh, the Warblers are about to perform. They are like rock stars here, you know? Everyone's pretty excited."

"The Warblers? Are they... a choir?" Kurt wants to smack himself. He's the worst at faking innocence. But the Dalton guy just smiles a bit wider, and leans closer to him.

"Yes, they are. I'm Blaine, by the way. Let me show a short way." And, before getting an answer, Blaine grabs Kurt by the wrist and pulls him in an unknown direction.


	5. Busted

**Busted**

Kurt is, in all ways, too unsettled by the circumstances to get rid of Blaine's grip on his wrist. He doesn't really register the walk through an empty hallway, that leaves them both in a room full of excited teenagers.

"Now, if you excuse me." And the next thing Kurt knows is that he's standing next to the door, watching as the Blaine kid joins the group of singing boys in the middle of the room. And starts singing.

_Let you put your hands on me, in my skin tight jeans, be your teenage dream tonight._

Kurt is so sure that the guy is singing _to him_ that he could faint. Except that he couldn't because his façade is a pretty good one and if he's still smirking like usual instead of flailing like a little girl, is because he deserves to be on Broadway. (But he does so on a daily basis, pretending that he's not about to choke on his own saliva every time Puckerman grins, so, why would it be such a surprise that he can still look at least a bit indifferent at the cute kid's performance.)

Still, when the performance ends, he claps. He can't help it. It is, what? Two claps, maybe three, and accompanied by a grin on the corners of his lips that says _I'm impressed but not that much, you could come and try to impress me in any other way any time you want_. And seems like that's exactly what the Warbler kid is going to do.

"Next time you should wear the uniform, new kid. You'll fit right in." He chuckles. Kurt thinks it's a kind of cute, the high class guy trying to intimidate him. He's as tall as a Hobbit and that uniform is the least scary thing in the world. (Until, of course, two really tall guys come to stand at his sides, frowning. Kurt reconsiders his idea that the uniform is not something to be afraid of.)

"Is he the spy you mentioned, Blaine?" One of the guys says, the Asian one. Blaine nods. Kurt says to himself, _I can put up with this three. I have faced bigger guys._

"Kurt Hummel, and you are?" He asks, raising an eyebrow. He likes to go looking for trouble.


	6. Diplomacy

**Diplomacy**

Surrealistic could work pretty well to describe the current situation, but it's not accurate enough. Seems like fate is having fun unsettling Kurt, doesn't it? Why wouldn't it, if not, get him to the Dalton cafeteria and put a cup of cheap coffee on his hands and three private school guys on the other side of the table? He is not sure if it's the world that's gone insane, or he has.

_Give me a freaking time machine and let me go twenty minutes back, so I can start a fight and not end up here, please. Or to make Puckerman stay just a week longer in correctional, that sounds well too._

"You're pretty much the worst spy in, like, ever." The black guy, David, says. He's got a nice smile when he's not trying to look intimidating, and has put in his cup of coffee more sugar than the average amount that a person ingests in a lifetime.

"Yeah, not exactly my life aspiration to work for the CIA." Kurt says, trying not to sound too much like a snarky bitch. Kind of a hard goal for him, especially when he's feeling incredibly awkward and all he wants is a cigarette.

"This is when one of us starts the _now you know our secret we'll have to kill you_speech, isn't it?" The Asian guy, who's name Kurt ignores, is the one talking.

"I guess so. Then I have to get the hell outta here in a pretty spectacular way, with a cliché phrase that will get your pants down." Blaine blushes and Kurt smirks, tilting his head a little. The furious red in the kid's cheeks disappears in a second, just as his smile.

"What's that on your neck?" He asks, before he can really think about it. He seems to regret it at the second, but once it's said, it can't be erased. (Kurt doesn't need to think to know what he's seen.)

"I... Uh..." It's been _ages_, really, _ages_ since the last time Kurt blushed. But he has not forgotten the sensation at all, and it's easy to recognize. The burning raising up his neck and cheeks, a desperate voice inside his head saying _Abort! Abort!_ But, wait, isn't it supposed that saying that he got in a fight can only make him look _more_badass? _Breathe and try not to look like an idiot, would you?_"Uh, I kinda argued with a teammate." He says, trying to pull himself together.

"From your choir?" David asks.

"From the football team." Blaine's jaw drops down and Kurt can't help but smirk. "What? I'm the best fucking kicker in the history of Ohio." He snaps, raising his eyebrows. The two guys at Blaine's sides seem skeptical.

"No pun intended, but you really don't look like a football player." Says David. "Or sound like one." Adds the Asian kid, being punished with a light fist in the shoulder and a "Wes, shut up." from Blaine.

"That's pretty much the big fucking problem, Einstein." Kurt rolls his eyes, with a bored grimace on his lips. "Not that any of the jocks is comfortable with getting in the showers with the _fag_ of school, honey." The three boys stay silent just long enough. "Now, if you don't mind, I'll get the fuck off. Nice to meet you, and thanks for the coffee."

Before they can say anything, he _stalks_ out of the room. (Because Kurt can't simply _walk_. He _stalks_, like the natural _star_ he is.)*

When Kurt is already in the parking lot, looking for his keys on his pockets, someone calls him. He turns around to find a really blushed Blaine, looking up at him.

"Would you mind if I asked for your phone?"

* * *

><p><em>*A little mention to Mama CP's Dalton and the best character of history, the one that inspired my Badboy!Kurt: Julian Motherfucking Larson, the love of my life.<em>


	7. Courage

**Courage**

Kurt leans against the bike and lights up a cigarette, seriously thinking about skipping off school today. He takes a deep drag, and glares around the parking lot. He can recognize Santana's red Volvo, coming his way. It stops next to him and the window rolls down.

"Hey, sexy." Santana jokes, bending a bit off the car. "Puck told me you went to Gay Hogwarts yesterday. Did you get a good shag?" She asks, raising her brows. She always mocks him about his (lack of) sex life, so Kurt almost hears a chorus of angels singing hallelujah when he's got the chance to win a match.

"Actually, I've got some cute kid's number, hon." He says, smirking. He whistles the cigarette and lets it hang in the corner of his mouth as he runs a hand trough his hair, to make sure he does not have helmet hair.

"Oh, congrats. Finally, the kid is all grown up! Now, if you don't mind, I'll go find somewhere to park. See ya inside, Hummel."

The car drives away in a matter of a second, and Kurt checks there's nobody to see him smoking on the school campus before taking another whistle. His phone sounds to the chorus of 12:51.

He thinks it is probably Mercedes, his best friend, asking where is he so they can go together to Math class, but it's not.

"Don't let them get to you. Courage."

He has saved Blaine's number as "Blaine Warbler" and that's what appears on the top of the screen. A smirk slides on the corners of his lips.

"Why are you staring at your phone smiling like a perv, Kurt?" The voice of Mercedes Jones echoes from his side. Kurt, a bit startled, mumbled a "Hi, hun." while saving the cellphone on his pocket.

"Hummel, I want an answer" Mercedes says, getting the sass on. Kurt whistles his cigarette and grinns.

"I met a cute guy yesterday." He confides, while standing straight and flicking the cigarette away. They two walk calmly trough the parking lot, heading towards the principal building of the school, and gossiping about _Gay Hogwarts _(I mean, Dalton) all the way.


	8. Daring

**Dare me**

Kurt checks himself on the mirror he's got on the inside of his locker, surrounded by a bunch of band stickers and a couple photos. One of himself with Mercedes, another with the whole Glee club and a last one with Puck and Finn. He smiles a bit before closing the locker.

When he turns round to head towards Chemistry, he ends up face to face to Azimio and Karofsky, both wearing threatening smirks in their faces. He is not even surprised, it happens almost everyday. He raises an eyebrow, looking almost bored.

"May I help you?" He asks, in his usual sarcastic tone. Kurt doesn't fail to notice that Azimio is carrying a Slushie in one of his hands. He wonders if the _popular_jocks ever actually _drink_ slushies.

"Coach Beastie wants to see you" Karofsky says, smirking. Kurt ignores his idiotic face, focusing on Azimio's hand and the slushie. It is blue. Why would he notice it's blue? Blue wouldn't match with his shirt.

"Thank you, how kind of you to inform me." He snorts, glaring away of the slushie just long enough to look at his teammate at the face. He can see Azimio's hand flinching in the corner of his eye, and moves his arm as fast as possible. The drink that was meant to get spattered all over Kurt's clothes falls over Azimio's arm.

"You wouldn't let that stain my leather jacket, would you?" Kurt asks, grinning. The empty cup echoes against the floor before the first punch is thrown.


	9. Promised

**Promised**

"You shouldn't get in fights" Mercedes says, handing the bag of ice to Kurt. They are sitting at the back of the football field, skipping Biology. Mercedes doesn't really like to skip classes, but Kurt isn't the best influence.

"You know all the _shouldn't_-s in this situation, Mercedes." Kurt answers, taking the ice bag from her hands. He drops it to the floor and searches in his pockets for a cigarette. "I was totally trying to be nice, they started."

"Oh, please, they always start. You should try to control yourself." Kurt rolls his eyes and Mercedes sighs. "Look, I'm not saying that you should let them beat you and do nothing, but, why don't you try… I don't know. Talking?" He snorts a laugh.

"Come on." Mercedes darts him a pretty dangerous glare, and he decides he should please his best friend sometime. "Ok, I will try it. Talking. Don't expect for a miracle, honey."

The bass of a Strokes song sounds when she's about to say something. In the instant Kurt smiles at Blaine's name on his screen, she stars screaming and trying to take the phone from him to read the messages.


	10. Revelations

**Revelations**

He's not sure if he's gotten to this conclusion because of Mercedes or because of Blaine, but Kurt has decided that he should try, just _try_, to be a little less aggressive. In despite of his _I hate any authority figure in the entire universe _attitude; Kurt would like not to get his record file any filthier than it is already.

So, he gets past three days in his most peaceful mood. He is like… eating rainbows, puking butterflies and ignoring it when the Neanderthals bump him into the lockers while walking past him. He feels very much frustrated, but a bit, _just a bit _satisfied with his own attitude.

"Faggot." Karofsky pushes him against the locker for fifth time today, making him drop his phone. He was texting Blaine, telling him about how he totally didn't get in fights these last days. Now, he picks up his phone and starts writing a totally different answer to "hows ur day been?"

_Fifth time in a day_. Kurt knows Karofsky is just taking advantage of the fact that Kurt is no longer answering with a punch at his attacks, and it's getting him off his nerves. No way he's going to put up with this shit any longer.

"oh- notng interesting- just some jerk getting on my way thats going to pay 4 it. hows urs been? hope better tn mine"

Kurt was heading towards the parking lot before Karofsky got on his way. Now he stomps in the guys' lockers room, only stopping at the doors to read the text he just received.

"cmon dont let him get on ur nerves- courage"

And Kurt breathes. He inhales; exhales and repeats. And walks slowly into the lockers room, unclenching his fists; loosing his posture a bit. Oh, _there he is_. He coughs softly, to clear his throat and call the guy's attention. He does not turn around.

Hands in pockets; voice low and raw, he talks to Karofsky's back.

"What the hell is your problem?" He asks. No answer. "C'mon, why don't you _be a man_ and _face _whatever stupid fear you have?"

"Excuse me?" Kurt stops walking when Karofsky turns around and moves towards him.

" Seriously; _asshole_, what are you so afraid of?" Kurt snaps, Because, _really, dude. _

"I just don't want you _checking my junk on the showers_, fag." As soon as he stops talking, he turns again, pretending to ignore Kurt.

"Oh, right. Because; I _obviously_ just come to the showers to check on you." Kurt almost laughs. Almost. Well, maybe, he snorts a little. He's not scared when the guy faces him again, towering over him, growling a menacing "_Don't push me_, Hummel."

"You're not even _my type_, Karofsky, _get over it_." He _spits_ the words. "Don't push me", Karofsky repeats, leaning closer, raising a clenched fist.

"What? Are you gonna hit me?"Kurt is grinning. "Haven't I already proven how bad of a decision it is?" He raises an eyebrow, letting the smirk hang on his lips. "You can't just punch the gay outta me, Karofsky." He mocks. He can _feel_ Karofsky's fist shaking, just a few inches from his jaw, ready to strike. "You can't do anything about it, _asshole_." He mocks, looking as cool as he can.

And then… _What?_ Karofsky leans closer, like he's going to mumble another quiet threat, but… _Oh my God_.

Hands press his face, keeping him still when Karofsky closes the gap between them and _kisses _him. He _fucking kisses him_. It lasts like… four seconds, four seconds where Kurt can't do nothing but freeze in his place, while the guy kisses him forcefully and open mouthed.

He gasps for air the moment the kiss is over, stepping back and covering is mouth with a hand in a single motion. Then, when the jock tries to kiss him again, the instinct kicks in and Kurt punches him in the jaw.

He doesn't even try a sarcastic comment, a threat, _anything. _Kurt just steps backwards, turns around and _runs_ away from the guys' lockers room.

* * *

><p><em>I actualized the previous chapters because I started re-reading them and Oh my God they suck. I just corrected a bit of grammars and such, because I started writing this when I was a total n00b at English, and only now I'm getting slightly more fluent. They still suck, but I don't have to cry every time I re-read them. <em>

_I know they're too short and I know it took me **way** too long to submit, and I'm so sorry. So, so sorry. Thank you all so much for the comments and the alerts and the faves, you made my day a lot of times (and, also, filled me with guilt, when the comments were in the line of_ it's been ages since the last actualization**)** _so, thank you so so so much and I promise I'll try not to procrastinate this story any more._


	11. Confessions

**Confessions **

"r u busy?"

"nope, do u wanna do somthng?"

"i need to talk to sm1"

"what hapnd? where r u?"

Blaine drives to Lima with his heart on his throat. He's quickly developing a fondness for Kurt, and his texts have got him to _really _worry.

He finds Kurt in The Lima Bean's parking lot, leaning on his motorcycle. Blaine can't find to notice that Kurt is _even paler_ than usual. The hands with which he holds the cigarette is shaking a little. Hurrying his step, he gets to him in a second. "What happened?" Blaine asks, concern filling his voice.

When Kurt looks right at him, Blaine can see his eyes are a little wet and his mouth is so tense it's just a line across his face. He would hug him, but he's afraid Kurt would hit him if he tried. Those light eyes are full of fear, anguish and anger.

"You know, I… I have never really… kissed anyone, before." Kurt finishes explaining. He's no longer angry, he's just sad, and he hides it by looking directly into his coffee cup. Blaine looks around the place for a second, registers the clouds outside the windows and the light decoration of the café, and glances back at Kurt. He really doesn't know what to say, so he just… he leans both hands over Kurt's, in a silent offer of support.

"You need to talk to him." He says, at last.


	12. Treath

**Threat**

"You don't need to do this." Kurt insists, frowning. _He_ doesn't want to do this. He is scared, that's the truth, but Blaine insisted on going with him and now he's _forced _to face his fear. Just because he doesn't want to look like a coward in front of the Dalton Boy.

"I want to. Besides, I don't trust your abilities at… You know, diplomacy." Kurt is about to give him a very bitchy answer, but there's Karofsky. For a second, he can feel the _bile _in his mouth.

"Pansy." Karofsky snarls when walking past him. _Just like… like he could erase what happened, what he did. Pretending that everything is just the same. _Kurt's jaw is clenched so tight Blaine can almost hear his teeth digging into each other.

"Kurt… Relax." Blaine says, leaning a hand in Kurt's shoulder. They walk after Karofsky, Blaine still holding Kurt's arm, willing him to stay calm. He talks while they follow the jock, murmuring "_take it easy_"s and "_he's not worth it_"s that do nothing to calm Kurt.

Because Kurt is fucking scared of what's going to happen, and being scared makes him angry, and he was angry enough already. Now he is a total wreck, and he's trying to look confident and put together and…

"I don't think we're going to find a better place than this." Blaine says in a soft voice. Karofsky just entered the library, looking for only God knows what. Kurt nods, letting him lead the way.

They find him in a corner, searching trough Chemistry text books. Kurt can tell that Blaine says the first word, but doesn't really listen to it. Well, he doesn't really _get _too much of the conversation; he's just… zoned out.

"What did you..." Karofsky is suddenly _so_ close to Kurt, he didn't notice when he moved, he didn't listen to what they talked, but he can _feel_ the jock's breath in his face. All his body panics, he is shivering. Kurt Hummel, badassest badass of the universe, is shivering.

Blaine steps forward to face Karofsky again and gets shoved against the bookshelf. The guy is much too interested on leaning over Kurt and whispering a threat to his ear to let that Dalton hobo interrupt him.

"If you say anything", he says, and it's a growl against his skin, "anything at all", Kurt can feel the tug at the neck of his t-shirt, "to anyone else", the bookshelf hits his back when Karofsky pushes him, "I will kill you."

The jock storms off before the librarian appears to tell them to stay silent. She finds a curious scene: a kid with the uniform of another school and that trouble child, Hummel, sitting in the floor. The private school boy looks at Hummel, and Hummel just stares at nowhere.


	13. Fear

Even if he tried to remember the times he felt scared (which Kurt _doesn't_) he couldn't recall more than three moments in his life. Sure, he's got a couple little fears every once in a while, but not _real_ fears. Not the ones that make you feel your blood cold, your lungs made of rock and your skin as fragile as a glass.

Kurt had been _really_ afraid, terrified even, since the moments they told him that her mom was dying. He hadn't felt scared only until she died: for months after her death he had been frightened that his dad would die from sadness, that Kurt himself would never be happy again, that he was going to be alone forever.

Then, one day, a kid at school called him _orphan_, Kurt punched him and he had been no longer scared.

He was downright terrified when he decided to come out. Yes, he was already a badass when he took such decision, and knowing that people feared him a bit was a relief, but he was scared nonetheless.

He came out to Glee Club with a smirk and an Adam Lambert song, like it was the easiest thing in the world. Sharing such information with the football team was harder (no jock likes to know he's been showering with a gay guy for almost a year) but not impossible, because they respected him.

The worst part was coming out to his dad. He was so afraid that Burt would hate him, that he would feel ashamed of his son, that… Kurt didn't even consider all the possible scenarios. He took all of his boldness in one shot and confessed his _secret_. The moment his dad smiled, the fear disappeared.

But the worst time of all was when Burt had the heart failure. He was so fearful he couldn't breathe, he couldn't think. Kurt's head was in a loop, repeating _he's dying, he's dying_ like a mantra. He just couldn't figure out how things could get better, how could he survive without his dad.

He is still a little afraid, because dad's heart is now a lot weaker than it was and he is not careful enough and Kurt doesn't want to lose him.

_But I'm not scared_, Kurt repeats to himself as he gets off the bike. He had to carry a couple bags with all the stuff he bought for Burt and Carole. (He thinks it's funny that his dad is marrying Finn mum's, damned be the day he became friends with the quarterback.) Kurt is such a nice son, doing part of the shopping for the wedding while dad and Carole are working (he can also keep the change and there's a new Toxic Vision jacket he is dying to have). Kurt is happy. Kurt is not scared.

He is standing by his locker, admiring what an amazing choice he made with this doll cake (_they look exactly like them, Carole will adore it_). He is not afraid, really. He is so distracted thinking of how Carole won't allow him to assist the wedding with his combat boots that he forgot about the fear. He also forgot about being careful.

"Faggot." A voice snarls in his ear. Before he can react, the doll cake is taken from his hands and Karofsky pushes him against the locker.

The blood drips from his neck, where he cut with a corner of the locker, as he watches the joke walking away. _He is terrified_.


	14. Panic

"I really, really want to be nice, but you both are useless. Seriously." Kurt says, running a hand trough his carefully spiked hair. Burt, Finn and he are at the choir room at school, that Will happily lend them so Kurt could teach his father and future brother how to dance. The wedding will be in less than a week.

"Ok, let's try again. You need to, unless, understand the waltz. It's the most boring and easiest thing in the univ…" Kurt stops talking the moment he sees Karofsky leaning at the door, smirking at him.

He feels the blood drift away from his face, his heart stop at the middle of a beat. Something that feels awfully like a hand tights around his throat, leaving him breathless. Kurt is _terrified_. For a moment, he forgets about the other two men in the room, about any other person in the whole universe. All that's left is the fear.

"Kurt, what's wrong?" Fínn asks. Burt, who is a lot less oblivious, turns around to look at whatever Kurt is staring. Karofsky walks away, still smirking.

"Who was that?" Burt spurts, frowning. Kurt opens his mouth to talks but doesn't seem to find the words, so Finn answers for him.

"It was Karofsky, he plays football with me. Why was he here?"

"Kurt?"

"Kurt?"

Kurt breaths as deep as he can and stutters a single sentence. "He said he's going to kill me."


	15. Hiatus

**Hiatus**

David Karofsky is expelled. Kurt can recall telling his dad that it's fine, that he really doesn't need it, that he doesn't need help, that he is not afraid. Nothing can stop Burt Hummel from storming into Higgings' office, though.

"I don't care if you don't like my kid. I just don't. You might think Kurt's behavior is not the best, but he's never threaten to kill a person. _Never_. He is a good kid, and he doesn't deserve…"

The rest of the conversation is a blur. Kurt is doing his best not to panic, but everything he can think of is that Karofsky will think he said _something_, something about the kiss, and he will chase him down and kill him.

Kurt is so scared he can barely breathe. When his dad guides him to the car, a reassuring hand in his shoulder, he just falls in the seat and stares blankly at the street. Kurt only notices his fist is sticky from the blood he's drawn from his palms with his nails when Burt's hand settles over his.

"Everything is going to be okay", Burt promises. Kurt can't believe him.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Blaine asks. He can see that Kurt's arms are a bit shaky, that he's jumpy and his hands are always fisted. The boy is paler than the last time he saw him, with the bags under his eyes so dark and defined they look like make up. He knows he's not okay, but it wouldn't be nice to point it out so bluntly. "I am worried about you."

Well, maybe _that_ was blunt enough.

Kurt glances up from his coffee cup, and stares at him. Blaine can feel he is being measured, that something in Kurt's mind is weighting how much of a threat he is. If he can show his weakness, his vulnerability.

"They said they would expel him. Fuck. Fuck. He's going to get back in less than a week 'n…" Kurt stops talking. He doesn't want to say that he's scared, even though Blaine knows it. "When he gets back he's going to kill me. He is going to get Azimio and a couple more guys and, fuck, I just can't put up with them all." Kurt feels like the knot that has been pressing around his neck ever since Karofsky threaded to kill him is tightening again.

"You don't need to get back there." Blaine says, slowly.

"What do you mean?"


End file.
